Snow.
Snow fell.
Snow fell heavily.
Snow fell heavily everywhere.
Snow fell heavily everywhere again.
Gritters.
Gritters dispersed.
Gritters dispersed quickly.
Gritters dispersed quickly everywhere.
Gritters dispersed quickly everywhere again.
Except in England...
...which was caught staring into the headlights once again as a result of which Scotland becomes disconnected from the world because London's airports which serve over 50% of the UK's flights and Southern England's public transport networks all fail to grasp what basic things need to be done when they see the same weather forecasts everyone else takes heed of and once again the London-centric news channels all watch the snow land on their little unprepared heads and react as quickly as the village idiot as though the world's about to end whilst the rest of the UK just gets on with it why does this happen every time it snows why is it that a nation disturbingly obsessed with weather reports crumples into a shivering wreck whenever the temperature falls below that desired for barbeques I think I know the answer it's all about the credit crunch our all powerful overlord elite who run and ruin our world enjoying not only a good weather report with its cheerful assessment of our impending turbulent doom and its pointless chatter about altocumulus castellanus but also the inane lazy journalism consistently displayed in the current economic climate that's talked us into recession so why not dictate from above that despite the imminent snowfall the gritters are to remain at the depot so that no-one can get to work and the economy continues its decline tracked with crayons by a tunnel-vision media until weary from all this weather and all these stories of financial pain we step up to the polling station and vote in the Conservatives.
I've had it. I'm off to chuck snowballs at vulnerable kids.
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A gut-busting glass of Scottish humour in Glasgow Scotland, in the official comedy podcast blog of the Top Ten Glasgow Guide, featuring the tragicomic collective voice of Scott Docherty and Alan Macdonald.
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"For the Love of G…lasgow, hereinafter referred to as 'Pure Genius', is the joint venture of Scott Docherty and his good friend Alan Macdonald, two heterosexual characters living in Glasgow.
It is the official, FREE and fortnightly podcast of, as Scott would describe it, the perpetually ground-breaking blanket of poetic resonance that is top-ten-glasgow-guide.com.
The intention of our podcast is to entertain. However, it must be made clear from the outset that we might not. In publishing our regular diatribe, we will aspire to provide no benefit to the listener. Some Glasgow travel websites & podcasts seek to paint a glossy, incomplete picture of the City which belies the truth of the matter. Others focus on Glasgow being similar to Basra, the Helman Province, Sarajevo, our streets littered with non-educated delinquents, and litter.
Our 'Pure Genius' however, will reside somewhere in between, leaving listeners with no impression of Glasgow whatsoever, providing no useful information, our ultimate aspiration being to make no difference at all to anyone, whilst at the same time, leaving every listener with the unmistakable desire to meet us and become our friend, expanding what may only be described as our tragic, ever-decreasing social circle.
Please join us. No really, please."