Once more unto the beach?

Naw, because we're back from our break and (provided I can bend Alan's arm enough tonight) we should be recording the new episode of the podcast on Tuesday.

Mark my word, it'll be our best yet.

When I say "mark my word" though, that actually means "totally ignore me as I'm talking nonsense".

Why not have a final listen to the 24th in the meantime. It'll be the best thing you do all day. And when I say "it'll be the best thing you do all day"...

A commendable work ethic?

OK, so today's when you would normally expect to be able to download the new episode of the show. However, because of some unforeseen circumstances including, but not limited to, Alan having done zero preparation for the show over the weekend by dint of his recently incessant booze-craziness, and my having no voice whatsoever following a knock-out dose of the man-flu, I'm afraid you'll just have to wait a little longer for The Twenty Fifth.

I'm actually due to head off to Portugal for a quick bout of sun before the winter blows in, our second attempt after our last booking there was cancelled when the flight company went bust last year, so hopefully the next show will be with you before the end of October, just in time for another tragic Hallowe'en special I'm sure!

In the meantime, feel free to listen to the last show if you haven't already, and fire us your comments to fortheloveofglasgowpodcast@googlemail.com.

The Twenty Fourth: "Rats"

The Twenty Fourth: "Rats".

As we wind down our first full day in cyberspace (OK, so that's sweeping to one side the fact that most of our shows last less than an hour, so really, even though this is the 24th episode, there's not been 24 hours worth of material, certainly not comedy material anyway, and also the fact that for each of these 24 episodes it's taken us at least 8 solid hours of yapping, weeping and editing to get the show down to less than an hour, so really for us, taking all that time into consideration, in fact we're in our 3rd year of doing this whole shambles of a tragic podcast), we talk about stuff.

Stuff like crippled rats, extinctified pandas, the Strictly Come Dancing versus X Factor drama, the ever-poetic deaths of Patrick Swayze and Keith Floyd, and the fact-based fact that Ricky Gervais revealed live on air on TV and everything that he listens to this show. The rising-like-yeast-on-speed Shimmer play for us once again, back by popular demand (www.myspace.com/shimmeruk), and thanks for tuning in. As usual, send us your own nonsense to

fortheloveofglasgowpodcast@googlemail.com.

Our first celebrity listener

So we'll be recording again tomorrow night, barring any untimely deaths or inexplicable rashes, and the next episode of the show will be ready for your ears on Wednesday.

It promises to be a shorter one this time, with the unpolished, unabashed feel of unpreparedness, but at the very least if you download it you'll be sure to find out the identity of our first celebrity listener.

At this point, and to keep your anticipation teetering on the edge of its no doubt anxiety-laden chair, I won't reveal the identity of this person. I'd rather you downloaded the show and listened to find out, basically because the identity of this major A-List celebrity is one whose talent for comedy the whole world is familiar with, so to let you know who it is in advance would be to ruin it's Ricky Gervais.

OK, so you dragged it out me. It's Ricky Gervais, the identity of our first celebrity listener, the identity of our first A-List celebrity listener who admitted on American TV the other night that he listens to our little podcast from Glasgow.

Yes, Ricky Gervais.

I can just imagine him now, Ricky Gervais, our first A-List celebrity listener, drawing doodles of weird animals while listening to Alan reveal all about his travels in Europe, wondering why his own podcast could possibly be downloaded more than ours.

So thanks for your admission on live TV the other night Ricky Gervais. We promise to mention you in the next show so you can tell all your friends.

The Twenty Third: "Eurotripped"

The Twenty Third: "Eurotripped".

We're back refreshed from a non-earned break, that is, a break that wasn't earned, and to drill home the point we've come up with our first show for a while lasting more than an hour. Yup, that's one full hour of pure, unadulterated comedy. You'll find it packed to the nines with Alan's important lessons from his trip to Europe and around Glasgow, the death of a Kennedy Dynasty and British Justice following the capture of Big Bob Megrahi, an unforgetable poem from Paul Gascoigne, and why we shouldn't be too worried about winning the War on Terror.

Happy Birthday to Scott's Inglorious Mum, and thanks to all our listener and fan for being patient while we've been away, especially those in Southampton. Call us. No, really...call us...

We also provide some live after the fact commentary of Andy Murray losing at the US Open, and our Glasgow music of the week comes courtesy of the increasingly popular Norquay (www.myspace.com/norquaymusic).

Drums and Rolls Please

Yes, the moment you may have dreaded the most in the last few weeks - the day has come to announce that in fact, despite many having demanded it, we've not met a gruesome, untimely death.

Alan's now back fresh and refreshed from his wallet-wearying Eurotrip, and I'm absolutely ecstatic at the thought of ending my brief adjournment in social networking. We'll be recording the new episode of the podcast next week, hopefully on Tuesday so it should be available to download on Wednesday.

As you might remember, the last show pretty much tailed off at the end as we staggered over its finishing line, and revealed just how drained and in need of a break we were at the time. You'll be glad to know however, that we've put the memory of that sorry experience behind us now. You'll be glad that the hearts are pumping once again and we're 100% raring to go.

So thanks for the messages of concern we've been getting in the meantime. If you want any mentions on the next show, just email us at -

fortheloveofglasgowpodcast@googlemail.com

and you may very well end up hearing your name. And your message. Through our voices. In a podcast you can keep forever. I mean, how about that?

OK, so all of this pretend excitement may just be as a result of my winning our local pub quiz last night rather than the thought of recording once again, but who cares anyway, right?

I'm the big winner!

The Twenty Second: "Rosie"

The Twenty Second: "Rosie".

With the greatest of thanks to Audacity, that most wizard of editing tools, and to Our Rosie, the winner of our last competition to whom this show is now dedicated (and who's definitely better than a convicted murderer), comes a brandly spanktuous new episode of this most tragic of podcasts. We wonder this time at the bold attempt by Fagan to force Oliver into swindling MJ's Paris, give praise to the passing of Patch Adams and Last Tommy Lee, and as always, spew out some pointless reviews of movies and restaurants, this time including Glasgow's The Loft, WB Yeats' Wine Lodge and Danny Zuko's new comeback movie The Taking of Pelham 123. Our Glasgow music this week comes courtesy of the superb Dr Flaw, and we leave you with some memories of Faith No More before Andrew Ridgeley was booted out the band.

See you after Alan return's from finding himself in Europe, and thanks again to all the other great entrants to our competition.